Just now as I was washing my face a bunch of random thoughts flew through my mind. I decided I better write them down now, to keep as a reminder. Warning: this is word vomit and most likely won't flow or make complete sense (thinking about it, all of my posts are word vomit and not completely thought out before typing and posting, my apologies).
-my desired hobbies
Right now, I don't have what most of society views as a real job. Part of me is really okay with that and another part feels like a failure. It is a constant struggle inside myself on this topic. You go to school, learn a specialty, get in debt, graduate, and don't get hired. I have to remind myself constantly that this isn't happening to just me. We aren't exactly in the best time for someone who has no experience, only an education, to be finding a job. There are many people out there who already have that experience and employers are easily able to choose these people over me and require 5 years of experience to even get an interview. I can't let this get me down and have to work with what I have. We are lucky enough for Jesse to have a good job that gets us by, being able to buy things we need and even things that we want.
Like I said, part of me is okay with not having a job (at least for now). I am able to stay at home and play housewife. When we are little we pretend, but this is real. Sometimes it is fun and really does feel like I am just playing. Other times I get frustrated with myself. Things like why I'm not keeping up with the cleaning or having another failed attempt at edible food frustrate me. But overall, I enjoy it. I get to read blogs, some personal, others about productivity, meal planning, and couponing. I mean, I get to stay at home and play with Penny!
However, sometimes I get lazy and that is what went through my mind while washing my face. I've decided that I need to take the approach that this is my job. I am housewife. I need to plan my day and stick to it. I need to set deadlines as if I am at the office. No, I'm not bringing in any income but I can work to save us money. I have been doing okay at this. I can research ways to save on what we are already spending. Make sure we have homemade meals that cost us much less than resorting to eating out. Those homemade meals should be nutritious for the both of us and for, that can always be improved. The meals can sometimes be cheaper by spending time scouring deals and finding coupons. No, I'm not making money, but I sure can save us money. This is my job and I need to be a more productive employee and CEO of our house!
That thought process took me to some goals that I can work on. I thought, once I've done my work, maybe I will get to the point where I can be done early and work on some goals that I have. So far three have come to mind and some could probably also be put in the next topic of hobbies.
One: exercise. This has been a goal of mine for a very long time. I may be thin, but that doesn't mean healthy. I have basically no muscle tone. This is something I definitely want to work on. I have some extra time right now being at home all day long, so it is the perfect time to start it. I want to do some research on it first to build up a schedule of what I will do to work out.
Two: become a CPA. What better time to start studying for these four exams than now?! I don't have an insane amount of stress from work to use as an excuse to put this off any longer. Naturally I need to do a bit more research on it before I begin studying. I'm lucky enough that I may not have to pay the $3,000 for study materials.
Three: read more. I want to set aside more time to read. I want to read books that I haven't and of course would love any suggestions you may have. It's time to get an Ames Public Library card!
Looking back on what I wanted to be while growing up, I think I followed my sister more than I realize. I wanted to be a teacher and I think this is because she started off going to college for this. She changed her mind, and so did I. I remember her coming home one weekend to take pictures around our farm for what I believe was a photography class. I remember following her around outside, trying to take cool pictures on my own. A horribly failed attempt at taking a picture of my own shadow comes to mind. Ever since then I've dreamed of becoming a photographer.
I took a photography class in high school and another one while at Grand View but never really pursued it any more than that. I chalked myself up to not being creative enough for the role. Well, I may not be creative enough to ever make money at it, but why not make it a hobby? I always think about things I could take pictures of and wish that I could actually make photographs of those images in my head. I may start off with sad attempts of creativity, not knowing the ins and outs of cameras and the best ways to enhance pictures, but you never know, I can always improve!
I want to start learning more and more about photography, cameras, and the related software. It only has to be a hobby. And if I'm not happy with the quality of work that I do, it can be just for me. It doesn't have to be for anybody else. I don't even have to have any more reason to do it than because it makes me happy.
It will take time for me to work on all of these things, job, goals, hobbies and all. But, right now I have time. Why should I waste it sitting around twiddling my thumbs? I realize that I can't decide to start doing all of these things tomorrow. That would be setting myself up to be overwhelmed and most likely failure. I'll have to evaluate my priorities to see where and when I think each of these should begin. For now I will simply start with my job and see where I go from there. The fact of the matter is, I do have goals and desires in life. These are just a few that jumped into my head in the less than 60 seconds it took me to wash my face. Having them out there to see for myself will serve as a motivator and a reminder that there is more to what I want to do in life than just have that office job, come home, eat, sleep, and go back to the job.
Isn't it amazing what a brain can pump through in just a few seconds?! I'm sure that isn't even all that was going on in there!